Alps to the Ring Tour - Epilogue

 Well, we're back home to dreary work - but what a trip!!

Let's start with some stats (for me):

Mileage: 1,866 miles
MPG: 23.5

Fuel: £514 (mix of 98 and 95)
Food: £497
Hotels: £320 (7 nights)
Tolls: £33

Weather

The one factor you have absolutely no control over - we did have 3 days of rain at the start, which made the Swiss Alp passes a little less exciting than they could have been but they were still impressive. After that, it was dry and warm, turning to hot and sweltering for the last 2 days.

I have been spoilt by my 2 previous Euro trips that were wall-to-wall sunshine, so I guess I'm owed something lesser this time around - can't complain.

The Roads

The main reason for going - our crowded little island (especially in the SE) is a real struggle to enjoy if you are an enthusiastic driver.

France is, in my experience, the best country for roads-to-traffic ratio. You can drive for miles in France without seeing a roundabout, a traffic light, any signs of humanity and only the occasional car. The only downside is that when you do get into a town, they do like their speed bumps.

Switzerland has the best quality roads, no speed bumps and low traffic density as well. The scenery is awesome but the food is very expensive - pretty much double UK prices. And Swiss people are not very friendly - sorry if any are reading this.

Germany has great roads but there is a lot of traffic UNLESS you stick to the L and K roads - no-one on those and they are lovely. However, being such a populated country, there are little towns every 5 miles or so even on the fun roads, so you don't get long stretches of hooliganism before you have to slow for a town.

Luxembourg is beautiful, roads as good as Switzerland but we literally took about 45 minutes to get across the whole country.

Belgium is much like England - bad surfaces and busy traffic on main roads but we did find some smaller roads that were clear and fun.

The Cars

My son's C63 was the star and the villain of the trip. He started blowing blue smoke early on, which we thought was an over-filled oil level but we now believe was a blocked breather pipe. This increased crankcase pressure and forced oil up into the cylinders to be burned off. A specialist assured my son it wasn't going to do any harm but he did get a crack in his oil cap, possibly due to the higher pressure. Another large bill for him - and he has to buy a new under tray after it broke on the autobahn speed trials.

But his C63 also did 200mph (!!!) on the autobahn, did an 8.20 around the Ring AND overtook a Ring taxi in the process - amazing achievements for an almost stock car.

Barry did actually have a CEL twice on the trip. We checked it with a scanner and it showed a 'warm catalyst efficiency' issue, whatever the heck that means, Possibly a new leak in the front section of my exhaust? Whatever, it seemed to have no ill-effects, went away by itself and Barry was faultless otherwise.

The Myths

Whenever you tell anyone that you're going on a trip like this, you ALWAYS get the same comments;

"watch out for trucks pulling out on you on the autobahn"
"you will die"
"watch out for Ring taxis, they're crazy"
"you will die"
"watch out for crazy Poles in knackered out Golfs on the Ring"
"you will die"
"watch out for the police - they're everywhere"
"you will die"
"when you crash on the Ring, you'll need to sell a kidney to pay for it",
"you will die" etc, etc.

I can only assume that very few people have actually been on a Euro trip - we saw maybe 5 police cars on the entire trip, even in supposedly car-hating Switzerland. One drove past me as I was parked illegally (in a bus lane) trying to get a photo of the Nurburgring sign - didn't bat an eyelid. I got a £65 fine for stopping for 30 seconds in a bus lane in London once!

The Ring was scary just because of the speed of other cars but if you've done a track day before and have done your research (YT, simulators) on the track layout, it was just great fun. The majority of the people you see crashing in all those YT videos are numpties who don't have the first clue of what a racing line is.

While I'm on the subject, to go on the Ring, you pay 35 euros and drive on; no booking, no safety briefing, no signing forms, no helmet needed. Despite this casual attitude, there are only 2 or 3 deaths a year on the Ring and no-one complains because we all know the risks and accept that responsibility. Compare that to H&S-mad UK, where you have to do all of those things just to go on a frigging go-kart track!

Finally...

This was my 3rd Euro trip and arguably the best because of something I hadn't expected to be that good - the Nurburgring. Like many urban legends, I was always worried that it would be a disappointment but nothing could be further from the truth; it was awesome. Not just the track itself but the whole aura around the area. Everyone you  see there is a dedicated petrol-head, loud rumbling cars patrol endlessly, the shops and cafe's are all car-themed - it is just a car lovers heaven.

Overall, it was yet another sublime road trip and just makes me want to emigrate to France or Switzerland - it's such a great driving experience out there.

Barry performed swimmingly and my son's car was a monster in every area. Best of all, he absolutely loved the trip, loved the thrill of the autobahn and especially the Ring and is already thinking about next year. To me, that is priceless.

Until next time...au revoir!

Alps to the Ring tour - Day 8

 Day 8 - Ring to Home, 400 miles

The last day is always a little sad, but I'd somehow managed to plan a superb route, if I say so myself. As with most of Europe, it was scorching - 28 degC expected later.

A day of 4 countries, the first section in Germany was brilliant as I had replanned it last night to remove all the yellow main roads. Our twisty route was smooth, fast and empty. Being a Sunday, nothing was open so no breakfast or even coffee - sad times.

But the roads made up for it - huge fun.

Crossing into country 2, Luxembourg, it continued to be amazing. With only 600,000 inhabitants, Luxembourg feels empty and the roads are meticulously maintained. We flew through it and soon crossed into country 3, Belgium. 

Belgian roads are much more like home, lots of bumps and potholes but my route was still giving, as we had empty roads and I somehow fluked the route through the Ardennes, so it was beautiful as well:

It was very hot now - lucky I put suntan lotion on this morning. With the windows down and the aircon blowing at my feet, it was lovely, the stunning landscape flowing by.

We entered country 4, France - more of the same. I must keep this route,  it was really superb.

The last 100 miles was the autoroute, to make sure we got to the tunnel on time. The kids were OK but because Le Tunnel had decided to put me in the large carriage (I didn't ask for it) and that seemed to be over-subscribed, I was put on the train after them, so had to wait an extra 30 mins. Must remember not to do that in future...

The last 60 mile slog home was uneventful and I arrived at 8pm.

Map of the route:

Alps to the Ring tour - Day 7

 Day 7 - The Ring

Today was just about the Ring - we hoped going early might be less busy, even though it was a weekend. 

First off, we said goodbye to Vic who had to be home for Sunday, so he left for his train.

We got to the Ring around 9am and it was a bit quieter. My son went straight on and did a lap, came back and we both went out with him again - Dear God, he is a fast driver!! Its not just his stupidly fast car,  he is young and brave and somehow,  despite never having been on a track before, he is a really good driver. Perfect lines, tyres squealing on the absolute limit but never feeling out of control.

To put it in context, people will always tell you to watch out for the Ring taxi drivers, pro drivers who take people for rides - they are very quick. 

Jake overtook one!!

Very few people do that. Ok, the Ring taxi was a Genesis which probably had 150bhp less than him but a pro can make anything damn quick (think Sabine in a van).

On my first lap with him,  I was petrified. On my 2nd, I was getting used to it and really enjoying it - he is fast but always felt in control. So impressive for someone with no real experience. He has to check his videos but we think his best lap was 8.20 or so - very, very fast for a lightly modified road car. The only things that overtook him were M2s and one Cayman GT4S (or something) - he went past M4s, an M4 Comp (on the carousel!) and many others.

I also did a single lap, not really expecting too much but although traffic was similar to the previous evening, there were fewer very fast cars  so I had less hassle from behind me and could take the right lines. I did unfortunately have one yellow flag which delayed me but I still improved to a 10.02 - with a clear lap, I'd be well under my 10 minute target, so I was happy.

Unfortunately for my son, his oil cap had cracked, possibly from the pressure caused by the blocked breather and it was leaking a little, so he decided not to do any more laps. So we spent the rest of the day watching the track from various vantage points:

Finally, after a classic Subway for tea, we got some pics under the other famous track:

A really great day - home tomorrow. 

Alps to the Ring Tour -Day 6

Day 6 - Bad Kreuzach to the Ring, 140 miles

The day started quite grey but warmed up nicely. Another short day to make sure we got to the Ring for the 5pm opening time.

After a few miles to get out of town, the next 40 miles were an awesome run alongside the Rhine, with beautiful views to each side, hills and vineyards, barges and quaint towns:

My son's car was having a problem, using oil at a not small rate. After calling a specialist back home, we eventually diagnosed a blocked crankcase breather, causing oil to backup the cylinders and be burnt off. There wasn't much we could do except check the level regularly and keep topping the oil up. 

The rest of the route to the Ring was superb; twisting, smooth, empty roads taken at speed - awesome. In fact, we made such good time,  we arrived at 2.30, with 2.5 hours to kill before the track opened. Fortunately, that wasn't a hardship,  as it was great just watching some awesome and weird cars arriving. 

And finally, the time came to enter the Green Hell... !!

I'd paid for 2 laps initially (£30 each) and I started taking it easy but I'd spent several hours on a sim and watched 100s of videos, so I knew the track pretty well - I was soon up to full speed. Unfortunately, my full speed was much less than the numerous tricked up M2s, M3s, Porsches etc, so I had to spend a lot of time moving over for faster cars, taking crap lines - I was never going to get a good time.  And so it proved; 10.53 on lap 1 and 10.29 on lap 2.

I did overtake a few cars, though,  and took the carousel on lap 1 (on lap 2, I had to take the outside as a couple of fast cars wanted to get past).

(Low-res pictures, I'll get some better quality later)

Other interesting things you don't get from a sim or a video; the track is much wider than I expected, very useful when you come into a corner too hot. Also, some of the armco is huge, more like a large pavement - I really wouldn't want to touch them.  And finally, some of the gradients are much steeper than they look. 

To be honest, because I spent so much time worrying about who was coming up behind me,  I didn't have as much fun as my son, who was much faster and had far fewer cars going past him - he only managed 1 lap (9.15) before the track was shut for an accident and that was it for the evening. We go back tomorrow...

We drove back 10 miles to our very nice guest house, a kebab and bed.

Route of the day:

Alps to the Ring tour - Day 5

 Day 5 - Stuttgart to Bad Kreuzach, 160 miles

A shorter day planned to fit in the Porsche museum and an AMG factory tour for the kids.

The AMG tour cannot be bought, you have to own an AMG to get it. The factory put up a Union Jack, gave them food and took them on a 90 minute personal tour (only the 2 of them) of the actual factory floor where the engines are hand -built. They even let them pack the makers plaque in a bag, for it to be attached at the Mercedes factory - pretty cool and unique experience. 

The Porsche museum was similarly impressive; a mere 6 euros (we somehow got an early bird ticket, so half price), a great cake and coffee to start:

...and up the escalator, to be met by the first car Ferdinand Porsche built in 1898 or so, and it was electric:

The history of how he grew up and actually founded the company was fascinating. 

One of the earliest 911s, chassis no. 57 - it was found in a barn in 2014 and restored:-

The concept Boxster, first shown in 1993 - wish they'd kept the interior:

Some of the 30,000 trophies Porsche has won in racing:

The Italian Porsche club had reserved the front of the museum,  so we couldn't get a picture there:

We met the kids for lunch and then had a rather dreary 50 miles of industrial Germany to get through. It got so dull, they split off and I rearranged the route to try avoid the dull A-roads. For future reference,  use L and K roads only in Germany - the yellow numbered roads are like the A1; clogged with traffic.

The last 30 or 40 miles to our very snazzy (for us) hotel in Bad Kreusnach was much better; twisty,  tree-lined roads, mostly free of traffic.  The kids had an even better time, arriving an hour after us. Pizzas and a couple of beers before bed ended another great day.

Map of the route:

Alps to the Ring Tour - Day 4

 Day 4 - Willesau to Stuttgart, 200 miles

Today was rearranged from my original route (which was more of the Black Forest) to take in Stuttgart and the Porsche and AMG museums tomorrow. Also on the way was some unrestricted autobahn - it would be a shame to not try, hey?

The day did start bright and sunny, enough to put suntan lotion on. The initial 30 miles to the German border was fairly dull and busy but the route improved after that, with some nice runs through forest.

Vic decided he wasn't bothered about the autobahn and decided to go try the famous B500.

And so we hit the autobahn, the 81 which was only 2 lanes and quite busy. Within a few minutes, I'd hit my personal record of 143mph before traffic got in the way.  My son hit 183mph but a piece of his undertray then snapped off, so we came off for him to remove it completely before trying again. Unfortunately, the traffic didn't improve although I managed to do 150mph (for 2 seconds) before roadworks stopped play. It was a very thrilling 30 miles, however - at one point we were in a 10 car convoy, all doing 115mph!

Over 120mph, Barry did have some vibration but it wasn't from one part of the car so must likely just the general design - never felt dangerous but flying past a truck doing 2.5 times its speed was unnerving/exciting.

Off the autobahn, we had a great 60 miles or so on German L and K roads (equivalent to our B and unnamed roads, roughly) running through the Black Forest. Mostly smooth (but not as good as Swiss roads - whose are?), they twisted and turned through tall trees and wide open fields, with a small town every 5 miles or so. So fun, we only stopped a couple of times so far fewer pictures than normal - German cakes are the best:

By luck, I'd seen Weissach on the map and routed through there. I thought 'Weissach' just did performance accessories for Porsches, not knowing that it is actually the location of the main Porsche factory and possibly where Barry was born! It was a huge complex, with 100s of Porsches parked behind the fences - quite a sight.

Our hotel on the edge of Stuttgart and 1 mile from the Porsche museum, was surprisingly good for the price and we had a great steak in their restaurant. 

My son then decided to go try again on a 3 lane autobahn, hoping the traffic would be lighter - a picture tells a 1000 words:

I'm just happy he's still alive but he's now a member of a very elite club - and it was all legal. Mad!!

Map of the day's route:

Alps to the Ring Tour - Day 3

Day 3 - Interlaken to Willisau, 200 miles

The day dawned bright and...no, it didn't,  it was raining. Today was the Alps and the bucket list passes but first up was Lake Brienz on the other side of Interlaken and with the rain not as hard,  we managed to stop for a coffee and pics:

After another 30 minutes or so,  the Grimsel Pass was first, the only one I hadn't done on my last trip here in 2020. The rain was wire heavy and traffic slowed us down. Near the top, we hit cloud and could hardly see 2 cars in front. At the very top, it was snowing!

Yeah, probably a nice view out there somewhere....

But, 5 minutes down the other side, we burst out into bright sunshine and a view of proper majesty:

It was so hot, steam was coming off the road and we had a great run, roof finally down. We did have on and off rain for the rest of the day,  however, but it strangely never ruined the drive.

At the bottom of the pass, we turned up the Furka Pass and very shortly, I stopped at the same layby I had broken down in my kitcar, 5 years previously (throttle cable snapped) - ah,  the memories!

 A couple of miles further on and I, once again,  failed to stop at the famous Belvedere Hotel for a picture! I did see it but the car park was very busy and the others hadn't stopped either, so I drove on past and stopped for a few pics a bit further on:

The Furka Pass was much shorter than I remembered but we did fly up there - bloody awesome. Coming down, it was much narrower and bumpy, with some scary drops which kept us going slower.

We stopped in Andermatt for a very expensive lunch (£31 for a chicken pitta and apple strudel - lovely but pricey).

Next up was the Sustenpass and it was the highlight of the day - bend after bend for 20 miles or more. Traffic wasn't too bad and slower traffic was quickly dispatched. We kept stopping for pictures and re-overtaking the same people 😀

The last 30 miles of the day I hadn't expected to be much good - when planning, I saw an interesting small, almost single lane road with lots of squiggles. In reality, it was amazing, twisting frantically for miles, climbing all the time, with a stunning viewpoint at the top, overlooking Lake Sarnen:

The final 10 miles to the hotel was a slow cruise to our hotel, with beers, pizza and tenpin bowling to end the day - brilliant!

Route of the day:

Alps to the Ring Tour - Day 2

 Day 2 - Cenans to Interlaken, 200 miles

The first couple of hours of the day was spent at a Mercedes dealer, getting 1.5L of extra oil sucked out the sump! No wonder he had blue smoke and he is furious with the garage - a bad review on its way.

Unfortunately, the rain continued for most of the day, but there were some good stretches of dry periods, and the views got better and better.

I hadn't planned the best route today, as we had quite a lot of traffic. 

At one point, we look stuck behind a tractor who refused to move over for at least ten miles. Frustrated, I took us on a detour which took half an hour longer but was more interesting for sure, returning back to the original route - right behind the same tractor!! But I managed to squeeze past him on one of the rare short straights and then I slowed to a crawl, which gave the others time to overtake him as well,  tractor man hooting furiously the whole time. Served him right... 😀

Lake Thunersee is normally a beautiful blue vision but our arrival coincided with some biblical rain - we felt like we were driving IN the lake! So wet, we didn't even stop for photo's. 

Our hostel in Interlaken was an impressive sight:

...with a resident St Bernard who was very friendly. We drove into town (too wet to walk), saw an impressive hotel:

...ate an expensive pizza (£22), had a reasonable beer back at the hostel (£5) and retired to bed.

Route of the day:

Alps to the Ring Tour - Day 1

 Home to Cenans - 450 miles

As usual on these trips, I was up at a stupid hour - 4.15am to get a 6.30am train. For complex reasons , I was getting an earlier train than the others. Sadly, the rain was heavy and even worse in France , where it hammered down for the first 200 miles to Reims. But we got the ubiquitous photos at the grandstand:

There was another group of brits on a road trip with an amazing sounding Ferrari  something or other (430?). 

The rain took a break for a while, and we had a great run on local roads, for another 150 miles of twisting, smooth and empty roads.

The evening meal was a traditional McDonald's (it was a Sunday, hardly anything else was open) before the last 30 minute hoon to our quaint little gite in the middle of nowhere.

Already, the roads are getting hilly and twisty only a short distance from the edge of the Jura mountains - hopefully, the weather won't be too bad tomorrow and we can enjoy them.

However, we do need to detour via a Mercedes dealer - my son's car had an oil change at an AMG specialist (supposedly) and the muppets have overfilled his oil,  so he's getting a bit of blue smoke. He's worried he might get frothy oil which could cause some damage. So we're hoping the garage will suck a bit of the oil out for him...

Route of the day:

Alps To The Ring Tour '25 - prologue

 So to the highlight of the year - a week long trip to the Swiss Alps, Germany and the Nurburgring. Planning started last October, the hotels are booked, the tyre pressures are checked, the weather is not looking great for the first couple of days but heatwave for the end - what's not to like?

The Runners and Riders

There are 4 cars and drivers (no screaming passengers) - first up is me in my 2005 987 Boxster S:

Then Vic in his 981 Boxster (the black one):

My son in his crazy C63 AMG:

...and his friend in his C43 AMG:

So that's around 16L and 1500 bhp in total - should be interesting.

The Route

The rough route is as follows (anti-clockwise):

I'll be doing daily updates with a more detailed route of the day. The only motorway is from Calais to Reims on day 1 (and a short stretch of unrestricted autobahn - ahem!) - the rest of the time, it's as twisty as it can get.

Highlights:

Swiss passes (Furkal, Grimsel etc)

Stuttgart (Porsche and AMG museums)

Unrestricted autobahn

Nurburgring

Hopefully, the weather will hold and we'll all get back in one piece (breakdown cover is sorted).

Let the Games begin....!!!!